Daughter of Encouragement

One of my goals this year is to become more effective in all that I do. I desire to be effective in my service to God, my husband, children and other people that come my way by the grace of God. I want Him to be pleased with me as I know that when I am effective in these areas of my life, His name is glorified.

What is the level of your effectiveness? You will need to take stock of your life in order to evaluate your current level. You will also need to be sincere or else you would be deceiving yourself. There is no use being in a place and not adding value to it. In any organisation for instance, employers will only retain employees who are highly effective and valuable. This is because the organisation is in the marketplace to make profit and would be looking to retain staff that could possibly help make this happen through thier creative ideas or God given talents.

God is also seeking for effective workers in His vineyard. What have you decided to do for Him this year in His house? It is high time we changed our attitude for the better! Being effective raises your profile in the eyes of God and is a way of getting His attention. Determine to do your best this year!  Look for ways to increase your knowlege. This could come through various means; since we live in the information age. Shine for the Lord wherever you find yourself, and He who sees in secret, will reward you openly. God bless.

Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might. Ecclesiastes 9:10a

Happy New Year to you all! I am grateful to God for sparing our lives. To Him alone be all the praise. Last year was a year I saw another dimension of God’s power. He stayed true to His word and revealed to me areas of my life where I needed to trust Him more. I thank God that I was able to commit those areas unto Him and by His grace, I can testify that God is faithful.

How was last year for you? No matter how it was, this year shall be better in Jesus name. Do not think God is not interested in your affairs. That would be a lie from the pit of hell. The book of Isaiah 49 verse 15 says ” Can a woman forget her suckling child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee”. God has marked you for greatness this year, so key into His programme for your life.

What goals have you set for yourself this year? Commit them unto the Lord and give Him room to fulfil them on His own terms. Do not allow fear to stop you this year as it did last year. God has not given you a spirit of fear, but one of power,  love and a sound mind. The mind that God has given you has the capability of achieving great things. No wonder Apostle Paul said, ” I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me”. God is interested in you succeeding and not being a failure. Therefore, arise, because it is definitely going to be well with you this year in Jesus’ name.

Say ye to the righteous, that it shall be well with him: for they shall eat the fruit of thier doings. Isaiah 3:10

The last few days has been quite busy in the city of London. The other day, I went to one of the shopping malls around my work area and I was amazed at the sea of heads I saw. The mall was like a war zone! I had to walk with caution because there was no luxury of space as I walked. This made me wonder why people were shopping even though I knew the reason.

Many mothers around the world are also caught up in the heat of the moment. However, have we paused to ask ourselves what the birth of Christ really means? To me, the birth of Christ is the demonstration of God’s love to us. Jesus came to redeem and restore us back to God. We have all sinned and fallen short of God’s glory, but Jesus’ coming into the world is a proof of God’s love for we His children.

See Christmas as a way of thanking God for the salvation of your soul. What would you have been doing now at this present time if Christ had not come to show you the way to the father? For some of us, we might be in places unimaginable. All we can do is just praise Him for his infinite mercies.

I will like to take this time to specially thank all you beautiful women out there who have encouraged me throughout the year. Your comments have really inspired me to continue writing. Thank you so much and may the Lord encourage you too. In all you do over the festive period, do to God’s glory. Take care and God bless

For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16

Are one of those fretting already because your dreams have not been realised? Fear not! God makes all things beautiful in His time. His time frame of stepping into our situations is quite different from ours.  Prophet Isaiah conveys this iquite well in chapter 55 by making us understand that God’s ways and thoughts are different from ours. Relax! Do not panic because God is at work in you.

Time has never been an issue with God as He created it. Ecclesiastes 3 tells us so much on this subject. We all need to understand that God is never too early nor too late. He steps into our lives at the right time. Delay is not denial! However, many of us are always in a hurry to accomplish our goals and we give up too soon.

Did you rightly set goals for yourself this year and hardly got the desired results? Do not despair nor feel demoralised. God is never late as I earlier stated. There could be many reasons why you have not realised your dreams. Just hold on, and don’t give up. The Lord knows the best time to bring thoes desires to pass.

As the year draws to a close, give God all the glory for sparing your life. Do not meditate on what you think has not been achieved but on what you have been able to do with the help of the Holy Spirit. Count your blessings one by one and you will be amazed to see how much God has done. Many people desire the things you have but do not have the means of getting them for some reason. This is an indication that you should be grateful for God’s mercies over your life.

In closing, I want you to know that God can still do what you have asked of Him at the begining of the year. After all, we still have 12 more days to go in 2008. Trust Him with your whole heart and you will not be put to shame. Take care.

Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. Psalm 37:5

I got a call one afternoon from an anguished woman who had been going through a lot of emotional stress because her husband has been involved in a string of relationships. She has not been given the attention due to her, and has had to go through life as a single parent; even though she lives in the same house with her husband.

How many women out there are in the same boat? The wine in the marriage has suddenly run out and there is no more love because there has been a betrayal. Even if I have never walked your walk, Jesus has. He knows what it means to be rejected and feel all alone. It is such a pity that many hearts are bleeding as I write, but the Lord who instituted marriage will restore such homes in Jesus’ name.

The question is what does such a woman do? I have never been an advocate for divorce and never will as I know that there is always a place for forgiveness. As long as this option is open, I believe it should be explored. Men who get themselves involved in adultery are unaware of it’s consequences as they ought to. The gravity of the matter is not realised until the future; by that time in many instances, it would have too late to make amends as much damage would have been done to the family. If there is anything I will love you as a woman in this situation to do, it is to take your broken heart to the Lord in prayer. He knows and understand’s your pain and how best to heal your heart. You have been wounded, and Jesus specialises in mending broken and wounded hearts (Luke 4:18).

Secondly, let the word of God direct you on how to confront the situation. Many women get worked up when they have been wounded and act in flesh. Seek godly counsel on what to do. Acting in flesh means taking laws into your hands and acting in accordance to the dictates of your mind. You need to ask God to direct you through His word on what to do. It is only when you allow God to direct you that He can intervene in the situation. Your husband needs help and that is why you cannot afford to deal with the matter alone.

Thirdly, learn to speak out and don’t suffer in silence. You can approach a senior pastor or minister in your church for counselling. If you believe they might not understand your situation, then seek professional help. I believe that with their support , your home will be restored in Jesus’ name.

As the year is drawing to a close, let us bring our homes before the throne of grace. The battle is getting fiercer and only those who make the Lord thier refuge will be saved. The devil is all out to destroy homes and that is why as women, we need to be sensitive in the spirit. Let us be careful not to neglect our duties as wives towards our husband. Your body is not yours. When he is in demand of sex, do not always complain about headaches and body pains! they are all gimmicks we should not allow. Handle the situation wisely if indeed you are not up to it, but do not always give flimsy excuses. If you think you can always defraud your husband of your body, you are only opening the door to the woman outside who is ready to grab what you have rejected. They are all over the world, and they do not care about the shape or size the men come in. All they are after is a good time; so get wise! God bless you.

The husband should fulfil his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1 Corin 7: 3-4.

The other day, I decided to call a friend of mine who runs a home based business on her land line. Unfortunately, she did not pick up my call which was strange! I then decided to give her a call on her mobile phone which she picked up having recognised my number. She apologised for this and explained that she owes her creditors so much and she does not have the means presently to pay them back. This has resulted in her cherry picking her calls.

Have you been afraid of opening your door or picking up your phone calls lately because of your financial woes? In 2 Kings 4, there is the story of a widow whose two sons were about to be taken into slavery because she owed so much and could not pay up. In her desperation, she ran to Elisha the Prophet for help, because she  was confused. Maybe like my friend, the widow had been playing hide and seek with her creditors until she could hide no more.

Elisha asked her what she had in the house and she informed him that she had a little jar of oil. Elisha told her to go to the neighbourhood and borrow many empty containers. A miracle was about to happen! This widow obeyed the man of God’s instructions to the letter. Elisha later told the widow to pour the little oil into the empty containers. They all got miraculously filled up. The oil did not stop flowing until there were no more containers to be filled. The widow was eventually instructed by Elisha to sell the oil and whatever she realised from the sale should be used  to pay off her debts.

How much do you owe? God is more than able to help you pay it off. If He did it for the widow in our story, He will do it for you too. Only believe and be obedient to any instruction He gives you. Do not lean on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). What gets in the way of our miracle atimes is our reasoning! We tend to rationalise and analyse how God would perform the miracle. This is how doubt and fear sets into our hearts. If the widow had allowed her reasoning to get in the way, she would not have gotten her blessing. Elisha being a practical man of God, took the widow through this process in order to make her realise that her input was required to create a miracle. It was not going to land on her laps just like that. We need to learn this too!

Some practical ways of getting out of debt might be to watch the way you spend; overspending can get you into debt. If possible get out of the habit of using your Credit Card and make do with cash for now. Secondly, stick to a budget. Thirdly, talk to your creditors; try renegotiating the terms of your loan(s) with them. See if they would allow you paying on your own terms or reaching a compromise. Fouthly, you might want to try getting a second job or a side business to help you. All these and many others are options you can explore.

As you lay your debts before God, trust that He will direct and teach you how to get out of it. Just trust and obey.

The Young lions do lack and suffer hunger: but they that seek the Lord shall not want any good thing. Psalm 34:10

How would you react if you came across your ex after marriage? I know many of you are wondering what I am talking about, but you will soon understand. Let’s put it this way, before you got married, you were in love with someone else (or so you thought), but as God will have it you met your husband ( and your circumstances changed). Years later, you come across your ex boyfriend or ex fiance. Do you hug him and continue where you stopped or just relate as friends?

Relationships are powerful especially with the opposite sex. As much as you may be thinking within yourself that you are now married and have nothing to do with your ex you still need to be cautious; even if both of you are now believers. The devil is not a fool. He can still flame up what you think has extinguished.

Years ago, I met a couple who had been married before. My friend who took me to thier house explained to me that both were in courtship years before they got married but had to go their seperate ways for some reason. They both married different partners and years later caught up with each other. The romance started all over again and they ended up getting married to each other.

We need to be careful how we handle old flames. It all starts with little phone calls, sending emails, texting messages to each other and they all seem innocent. I am not saying this is bad in itself, but we need to be careful and apply caution where necessary. Know where to draw the line. While some women have formed healthy relationships with their ex after marriage without it affecting their homes, others have allowed it to wreck theirs. The bible warns us to be wise as serpents and hamless as doves( Matthew 10:16). We are also encouraged not to be ignorant of the devils devices. If you know that you are not emotionally strong enough being ordinary friends with your ex, then do not get too close. Do not see them as your enemies but keep the relationship at arms length.

There are many marriages breaking up by the day all because some women have been careless. We are in the end times and one of the missions of the devil is to break homes. He will do anything to achieve this, so do not give him a chance. Guard your home; love your husband and children and even if your relationship is turning sour, do not run back into the arms of your ex for security! If your ex is making some advances towards you at this time do not fall for it! God will heal your home if you bring it to His attention. He loves you, and as the creator of the marriage institution, He knows what to do to make your home whole again. Keep yourself pure and let God be glorified in your life. God bless.

There is a way which seemeth right unto a man but the end thereof are the ways of death. Proverbs 14: 12

If I may ask, is it a crime to laugh? If not, why do we find it difficult to laugh even in rough times? We definitely need to relax our muscles. I have heard it times without number that it takes more muscles to frown than to laugh. That is amazing! The more reason I should be seen smilling or at least in a relaxed mood.

The devil’s mission is to kill, steal and to destroy us in every way, but Jesus came to do the opposite. When your heart is heavy, do not respond in the negative, but switch off and allow sweet memories to fill your heart. Thank God for those memories, and you will be amazed how soon your mood changes.

Let your children see another side of you. For some mothers, the children only see the angry side of them or the shouting and ranting side. Let them grow up learning how you handled stess and sorrow in a peaceful way. We are the best teachers of lifes lessons to them. There are many times I recount to my children the virtues in my mother. They are nice memories of my childhood days and I want my children to grow up knowing that their mother always handled situations in a calm way, and always found time to smile and laugh with them. I have carried out a bit of research about the benefits of laughter and discovered the following:
1. According to a new university of Maryland Medical Center study; laughter along with an active sense of humuor may help protect you against a heart attack.

2. Laughter allows for better blood flow by about 20%.

3.According to BUPA, a global health and care organisation, laughter is also thought to help fight off illnesses by boosting your immune system.
4 Laughter reduces pain. An American nurse has found that telling jokes to her patients before she administers a painful treatment reduces their discomfort.

5.Laughter lifts your mood.

6. Laughter helps keep diabetes under control (can you believe that?).

Let us make it a point of duty to laugh everyday. If the doctors are recommending 5 portions of fruit a day to keep us healthy, let us add doses of laughter to the daily recommendation to keep ourselves stree free. God has given us all things to enjoy, so do not let the enemy cheat you out of your blessing by making you look unhappy most of the time. Take care.

A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22

Have you ever wondered why God allows us to go through pain? I have, and the Holy Spirit has been able to open the eyes of my understanding to see some of the reasons I’ve had to go through the things I’ve gone through.

Pain is sometimes necessary for our spiritual growth. There are even times God refuses to answer certain prayers we bring to Him, in order to teach us how to rely on His grace and power. When the Apostle Paul was going through His own struggles which He referred to as “a thorn in the flesh”, he asked God to take this away from Him, but God’ refused to do so because He wanted Paul to realise that His grace was sufficient to see him through whatever challenges he was facing (2 Corinthians 12:9). This might sound harsh, but Paul was grateful for this experience, because he  learnt that in his moments of weakness, God’s strength was made manifest.

God does not delight in seeing us hurt, but He loves manifesting His glory through our pain. I always learn the lessons of life through my pains. There is always a higher level I attain during and after this period. In most cases, looking back at my experiences, I have had cause to glorify the name of the Lord in everything. There are new insights that come to light while in pain. Even the bible says in Hebrews 5:8 that Jesus learnt obedience through the things he suffered.

Most successful businessmen and women can testify to the fact that they have learnt mostly from the mistakes they made while building up their business. An example is Peter Daniels, an Australian businessman and motivational speaker. He failed in business more than twice, but never gave up. He expressed the pains he went through in one of the conferences where he was a guest speaker, and stated that he later built a better business by drawing lessons from his previous mistakes.

How are you responding to your pain? Are you angry with God over your challenges or are you thanking Him because you know that something good will come out of what you are going through? Do not despair because, God understands what you are going through. He also wants to surprise you in a big way. Just keep praising Him in all things. Hard as this may sound, just do it, and you will not be put to shame. Be blessed.

Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love Him. James 1:12

In life, we would always come across people who find fault with everything we do. They are quick to judge you and in many instances, they are the first to pass negative comments about us. How do you handle your critics?

A few years ago, I had a discussion with a top executive lady who told me that her husband always looked for ways to put her down. She obviously earned more than him, and I think he developed a complex as a result of this. The only way he could express his feelings was by putting her down.

I have recently revisited the story of Nehemiah and it dawned on me that inspite of all what Nehemiah and the Jews faced in building the walls of Jerusalem, they remained focused on achieving their goal. This determination frustrated Sanbal’lat and Tobiah who did everything to discourage them from building the ruined walls of Jerusalem.

You need to recognise that the devil will try to discourage you by planting critics on your way to success. This is aimed at weakening and discouraging you. The only way to combat this is by ignoring the discouraging words and moving ahead. The moment you start to dwell on the negative words, you will definitely be discouraged.

Secondly, ask for divine wisdom on how to respond to your critics. Jesus handled this area quite well in His days on earth. The Pharisees and Sadducees never had anything good to say about Jesus or His ministry. They were always sceptical about His doctrines and sought for ways to question His authority. Nevertheless, Jesus always had a word of wisdom to reply. As He is alive today, be assured that He will grant you wisdom on how to reply to your critics.

Do not be discouraged at this time. While I understand that it is good to be open to positive criticism in order to improve our ways of doing things, there are always those close enough to look for the faults in us. Always remember that greater is Christ in you than the one in the world( 1 John 4:4). He will see you through and encourage you all the way in your endeavours. Take care.

Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness sake; for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:10